life in finland:

-5°C

in california, people are being rushed to hospital with frostbite. the finns light a fire and have their last grilled sausage before winter.

-10°C

the british turn on the heating in their houses. the finns put on a long-sleeve sweater.

-70°C

the finns start getting angry because they can’t store their koskenkorva vodka outdoors.

which is (incorrectly) apropos of the fact that darren has managed to freeze the black label smirnoff in the freezer. 40% vodka freezes at, as far as i can ascertain having forgotten all formulae by which to calculate freezing points, about -25°C and domestic freezers should be set at -18°C.